What kind of Sadistic Child...

Dreams of becoming a dentist?

I never understood that. It’s the one job in the world I just cannot understand how you end up doing.

All the others, I can find a reason. No one dreams of becoming a prostitute or a lap dancer, but you get into that when you need cash. Nobody dreams of becoming bin-man or a maid, but when you don’t have qualifications and need money, you do what you’ve got to do. And no kid really wants to be a referee but ,when you’re a corrupt idiot with bad eyesight and no football talent, you'll take it.

But a dentist? You need to seriously work hard to become one. You need degrees. Years of studies. Hard work. Dedication. A passion for teeth.

What kind of demented person went to the dentist when he was a kid, came back home, ran into his dad’s arms and told him” That’s what I want to do when I grow up”.

What hooked him? Did he enjoy the pain? Did he enjoy the drilling? Did he enjoy having his mouth wide open for an hour? Did he sit back in his chair while getting a needle in his mouth and say to his himself “You know what? This is class, this. I hope this lasts for hours”. Did he start dreaming of doing that to people, each day, from 9-5, for the rest of his life?

I could never get my head around it. Why would someone dream of doing the one job where you know people will hate coming to see you?

And make no mistake about it. People HATE going to the dentist. You only ever willingly go there if you’re in huge pain, and even then you’re basically dragged kicking and screaming. There are absolutely no advantages to it. Dentists are not like doctors: they can’t give you good news. They can’t tell a woman she’s expecting. They can’t tell a Lebanese man just back from a month in Amsterdam that he’s got the all clear.

Nope. Dentists will, at the very least, give you a cleanup. They’ll make you uncomfortable for at least an hour. And at the very most, should you need some real work, they’ll torture you so much that you’d wish you were water boarding in Guantanamo Bay. Yes, sometimes they provide relief from pain and fix your problem. Well done, psycho. I’ll still leave that place feeling I've gone 12 rounds with Mike Tyson and  praying I’ll never have to see your face again.

I can’t stand the sight of them with their silly green outfits and those huge goggles they have over their heads. I hate their clinics with the months’ old magazines and that ridiculous smell. I hate how they tell you to open you mouth wide every 20 seconds: What am I, a Tijuana hooker? You're the professional pal. Work within my limitations.

I look in their eyes and I see pure evil. I see the  eyes of men who were bullied when they were kids and used to chop frogs’ heads off for fun. Whose idea of pleasure was getting their teeth drilled on weekends. Who, while I dreamed of being a footballer, fantasized of terrorizing normal people like you and me.

What a bunch of sadists.

Comments

[Account Deleted]

Mais arrette....... what the hell did your dentist do to hate them all?
for all i know, my dentist is the best and i never feel anything when i go to check on my teeth... maybe you should try mine... :)